some things on my mind

Namely, the thing on my mind is that someone needs to combat the two-sentence, post-a-picture-of-every-meal-I-eat-and-every-small-child-I-know/fathered/mothered/saw-on-someone-else’s-facebook trend. The internet is for serious, insightful discourse, dammit. And videos of people getting hit in the nuts and/or falling down.

Seriously, I can’t get enough of that stuff.

So, what do you talk about when your (purported) audience is spending (according to unverifiable statistics, mostly from my head) 83% of their internet time looking at the things I mentioned above, and reading the occasional rant from someone getting angry about a dog pooping on their lawn, or some such nonsense?

As it is March, and the madness is upon us, let’s start with that. Irrespective of the success/failure of my bracket (failure), the NCAA tournament is a fascinating animal. Entirely unpredictable results on the court, painfully predictable commentary and insight off the court.

The biggest disappointment, I think, is the new, “serious analyst guy with highlighter at the ready” Charles Barkley. His analysis used to be shallow, simplistic, and sprinkled with misnomers and instances of derailed trains of thought that made it pretty funny. Now we just have to watch him struggling to think of something to say after Ernie Brown and Kenny Smith have covered the most obvious points.

Please, Dr. Brown and Dr. Smith, tell me again how a team down by 20 at half needs to shoot better in the second half to have a chance. Or how those guys from FGCU are playing basketball for the joy of it. Well, everyone is playing for joy when they’re winning. How many care-free alley-oop attempts were we treated to as Florida became the first team in the tournament to actually defend the Eagles in the second half? FGCU was successful because teams don’t work hard at defending, not because they are joyful offensive savants.

Finally, can we now officially agree that next year, when Gonzaga inevitably wins 28-30 games by beating up on my alma mater Santa Clara (CBI Finalist, yo!), LMU, and USF, they are NOT a #1 seed? If we keep making teams like that #1 seeds, a #16 seed will eventually win a game..

Oh, and one more thing. When you beat a team in the First Four, you have not won an NCAA Tournament Game. Congratulations on being the 67th team to get into a 64-team tournament, but please, let’s maintain some integrity here. If every team doesn’t have the opportunity to play in the First Round, then it’s not the first round. It’s a play-in round.

Thank you for your time.

Cheers.

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