admin

So today it’s time for a bit of blog housecleaning – i need to post a few pictures that are long overdue to be shared with you all, allay some fears, correct some misunderstandings from past posts, and solve all of the world’s problems, as my mom likes to say. 

First off, misperceptions about my roommate, as evidenced by the sympathy coming from my sister when she read about the rhino.  The rhino is a great roommate, nothing like that roommate we all had in college who ate all of the saltines and strawberry jam.

in fact, i think one of two things would have happened if kevin had been my roommate in college -

1) kevin would have dragged me with him, and we would be running some kind of multi-million dollar soccer merchandising company 

or

2) i would’ve dragged kevin with me, and we’d be living on the beach in san diego, playing beach soccer by day, and teaching soccer clinics to earn money so we could drink guinness at night.

so of all the things i have to worry about, a roommate is not one of them.

Second, there has been a significant drop in the attention given to Korean-Asian Relations (KAR) on these pages.  as the former president of the KAR association at West Point, Glen Dare has been conspicuous in his absence.

So, to counteract this trend, i must mention, that if Glen Dare had been my roommate in college, i would have crazy karate skills and would actually know how to use chopsticks.

Also, i must mention that most of the pictures you see on this blog are courtesy of Glen, as he is never without his camera (or his throwing stars)(or his black ninja pajamas)

And finally, a few pictures to spice things up a bit, and to prove to my family that, despite their assurances to the contrary, there are in fact pictures that are of no interest to anyone…

. just so mom knows i’m eating healthy…

 me and the rhino practicing our dance moves on the way to the PX…

and, finally, you know this sign wouldn’t be here if it hadn’t been a problem in the past…(they just won’t let us have any fun around here)

 

all right, more to follow.  10 weeks down, we’re rolling along.

cheers.

Transformation

Those of you who read this blog religiously may recall certain posts referencing the presence of a “hippo who lives in my room” (no, it’s not a Dr. Seuss book, although it should be). 

  Kevin in the Tigris… 

The hippo is CPT Kevin Ritchie, the man who cannot even take a breath without knocking something over in our room.  Although he does breathe rather heavily – more on that at another time…

There is a point here, and it is this : the hippo has, of late, begun to take on the characteristics of a different animal.  He has become more aggressively dangerous and less passive-aggressive, even (and sometimes especially) with people who outrank him and/or whom he doesn’t know (but somewhow knows he doesn’t like).  In short, he has emerged from his hippo cocoon, and henceforth all references in this blog about Kevin Ritchie will refer to his rhino-ness, his rhino-like activities, and his all around rhin-ocity. 

By way of tribute to the Rhino, and his inability to effectively modulate his body temperature, I offer the latest Top Ten: Top Ten levels of sweating as demonstrated on a daily basis by the Rhino.

In order from least sweaty to oh-my-god-did-you-fall-in-the-pool:

Level 1 – Beads of sweat on the forehead, no rolling or other movement of sweat droplets.

Level 2 – Limited droplet migration, intermittent flow.

Level 3 – T-Shirt saturation begins around the collar; Elvis’ face begins to take shape on chest and back.

Level 4 – Waistband dampened, sweat begins to saturate socks.

Level 5 - Patches on T-Shirt merge: outer layer becoming splotchy.

Level 6 - ”Sweat Speedo” …enough said.

Level 7 –  Entire outer layer is saturated, pants down to kness are splotching.

Level 8 – Sunglasses fog – may slide from nose slightly.   

Level 9 – All clothing is super-saturated.  Nile and Amazon seem like trickles compared to flow of sweat.

Level 10 – Sweat pours freely from all appendages.  Puddles form in boots.  Sweat begins to condense on outside of Kevlar.  Dehydration imminent.  Social acceptability hits rock bottom.  Rhino is happy.

 Happy Rhino.

for those of you who had just eaten before sitting down to read this, i apologize if your stomach is (understandably) unsettled a bit. 

pictures to follow in the next post, to include our impossibly tiny room, and signs that should never have to be posted.

cheers.